New Segment For A New Week..."A and B Music Reviews"

My personal highlight of Super Bowl was finding party where they had their own deep fryer: that’s homemade wings and poutine all night (although Prince opening up with “Let’s Go Crazy” at halftime cannot be fronted on…). I’ll just say this: all the turnovers in the world couldn’t have made that game compelling. Just watching it was like one long Dennis Green moment-reminder, as even that Devin Hester-Ted Ginn-esque return on the first play couldn’t make things interesting. Hey Kanye, your squad got humped by a team coached by one of the lightest skinned mens on the planet…be afraid, he could be bringing the 80’s back (bet you ain’t angry at his wife, tho…or maybe, after watching the emasculation on display in this video, you are…). And could it possibly suck anymore to be Eli Manning right now…we’ll leave the Marino suicide watch till after Brett breaks all his records next year.

Alright enough of that, allow me to welcome you to a new feature for this site: it’s called “A and B Music Reviews”. I’ll select a few songs, usually new stuff I get a hold of, and then get Mr. A and Mr. B to chop it up. You also might notice I have made the featured songs to accessible to all, so click the links on the song titles and you should be able to acquire the music that is being discussed. It’s the blog that now gives back.

Now, a little background on the reviewers: Mr. A is a hip-hop/bashment head with groundings in the old school, particularly, leanings to the funk and a soft spot for soul. Mr. B is a more youthful (although at times it may not seem that way), musically diverse listener who is so well versed in cool that he would make the most pretentious music snob envious.

So that being said, take it away, fellas…for the first time out, it’s all about RNB and pop…

1. One Chance feat. Bobby Valentino, Trey Songz and Lloyd - Look at Her Remix

Mr. A says:
Alright...the first tune is One Chance with the ‘Look at her remix’ featuring the RNB All-Stars...seriously tho, I think the original was with one of the dudes from D4L. No Laffy Taffy…

Mr. B: says:
Really? Why the hell would these pre-pubescents do a remix? Basically I group Bobby Valentino in the JBU crew: Just Below Usher.

A: You know, ‘One Chance’ is Usher's first signing to his label... goes to show the pull Mr. Raymond has in “the in-DUS-tree”...getting these cats together...it's like RNB unity...

A: "U-Nnn-IIIII-Teeee-WHYYYYYYYYY!!!"...…"Now who is you callin’ a bitch!"

B: lol

A: I guess Usher just holla'd at them other dudes...on some 'be on my ish' ish.

B: I mean who better to rear these young bucks than him: I can just picture these guys in some kinda boot camp a la "making of the band". Usher making them run errands, doing the A town stomp. Hey, that'd make a great reality show.

A: What's more interesting to me is who he didn't get on the track...namely, one Chris Brown a.k.a the nemesis.

B: LOL

A: I can't help but picture Usher softly cussing this dude out...ripe with conflicted sexual tension, like: ”That little bastard…stealing my dancing and shit...but he sure is a tall, glass o' beige drink....”

B: LOL! Glass o'beige drink…sheeeeeeeit, you gonna start singing "Old man river"?

A: Naw. Ok, personalities aside, whatcha think of the song?

B: Ok, well correct me if I'm wrong but Trey Songz is in this right?

A: Yup....Bobby V...Trey Songz...that Lloyd kid...man, they better have a big mirror in that studio...

B: Well, I listened to this track and for the first few seconds, I was pretty attentive: I was interested in hearing our boy Trey, cause he’s the one I don't want to hit with a shovel. But they all sound the SAME! Is that what they're teaching over there in Usherville. I really had a hard time distinguishing them apart…or was that just me?

B: Anyways, my initial gut reaction is a well thought-out, emphatic "eh"

A: One word for this track....’generic’. It's just that Jodeci-wannabe, get-sexy school of same ol' same ol'. Tried by many. Perfected by few. NEXT!

2. Amy Winehouse - Rehab

A: The song is Amy Winehouse's Rehab...she's gonna be the new big hipster thing...<cues up DJ Clue effect> “New shit…new shit…”

A: She’s from England, her voice is way more Sarah Vaughan than Mary... this is the first single from the album...she just came off a vocal cameo on the last Ghostface EP...

B: Well I've been a fan for awhile, since her first album Frank (2003), I liked it a lot. It was fresh and she got a lot of attention in the UK.

A: Of course Mr. B, that puts you way ahead of the curve...as per usual…got the album title with the year in brackets and err-thang…

B : <sucks teeth while ignoring Mr. A>That album was pretty eclectic, and she switches gears almost seamlessly. I like her, and it once again displays the UK music industries’ superiority in cultivating young talent.

A: I heard the rest of this new album and it’s all heavily influenced by that 50’s and 60’s soul sound... it is a much more enjoyable listen than, say…the last John Legend album. But I don't know if the people here will be able to take an album full of retro-styled music

B: You're right, North America is pretty focused on innovation or stagnation not regression but its nice to take a look backwards sometime…

A : I can say this...she's gonna have to be marketed very carefully in the U.S. if she's gonna break through commercially…

A: Let me get my A&R on: first, gotta market her like a white artist...I mean, not in the singles-driven way bla...uh...urban music revolves in...

B: Hearing her voice, you envision a young black girl who grew up listening to Billie Holiday or Janis Joplin but she’s actually white and Jewish…

A: Touché. Second, they need to get one of her joints on, say, Entourage or something, laying the seeds... Once they get Lindsay Lohan to publicly co-sign, the album will be a full blown pop culture trend; like any other fashion accessory. At that point, it’s a wrap...instant mass appeal.

B: LOL. Very true. It'll be "What was that song Turtle was driving to?" …but I have to say her voice alone will be her biggest asset.

A: OK, verdict time. To me, this single is fire...it's mos def the favorite joint from the album and I’ll go as far to say my current RNB flavor...she had me at, “There's nothing you can teach me, that I can't learn from Mr. Hathaway...”

B: Agreed, but I like "I'm no good track as well"

A: Yeah, that was the joint she redid with Ghostface...and I have to admit, I enjoyed the Ghost version better...his rhymes with her on mostly just the hook.

B: So is the album worthy of downloading?

A: You mean worthy of buying …well, for cool points alone, it couldn't hurt...

B: Lol, we seem to be on the same page…Maybe I’m brainwashed but everything UK seems "cool" to me…and she swears so smoothly you have to play it back to catch it: "you kept your dick wet". Man, she's got a potty mouth…

B: My prediction: every freaking song on the album is gonna get remixed by EVERYONE: any takers?

A: True say. They could remix this one with a funky drummer beat; make it a Lyn Collins-like ode to James...might get it on “urban” radio…maybe even in the clubs...

A: But stripping down this track for a remix basically denies the music of what makes it so compelling. It would just be… surprise, surprise...dumbing it down for the masses to suck up .

3. Kenna - Out of Control

A : Ok the next joint by Kenna, called ‘Out of control’. This dude is Ethiopian born, Virginia Beach raised...hooked up with Chad a.k.a the Asian unseen half of the Neptunes....and this is what you get: a sound that is really, really…really heavily influenced by the 80s.

B: That obvious huh? Well, it’s not that bad but I don't see it flying up the charts, except for the fact that a Neptune put his name on it. The white suburban youth will be "up on this" but that's about it

A: Uh, just the white suburban youth…isn’t that market bank? All I can say is that it reminded me of the sort of music you'd find on an Ipod commercial. Then I saw it’s featured on that new portable Play Station commercial... uh, portable PS...what’s it called again?

B: I think you mean the PSP. Your age is showing Mr. A…

A: Whateva man, my kids is at they baby moms…normally they’d break it down for me. Back to the song, I don't mind the verse, but the chorus is less appealing to me...apparently, shit is out of control.

B: Yeah, apparently. Now I don't know much about this kid but I smell niche and novelty all over this: Ethiopian/London born; singing rock anthems. It’s got that "brand new ish" all over it. I kinda feel sorry for him, cause the novelty's gonna wear out and quick.

A : Can’t ride with you on that “brand new” factor; that 80's sound was big a hot second ago... but now…not so much. I guess that's why he had to go to Sony to make sure he‘s getting paid.

B: Yeah, ok. The Killers kinda started it and, yeah, electro clash is thriving but I think it’s hit the saturation point.

A: I just really, really, really hope that Chad gets his face ALL up in that video...

B: Yeah, he definitely will. And he won’t be dancing (badly) like Diddy but he'll be there. And Pharrell will be up in there bopping or skateboarding or doing both. God, he's annoying.

A: Well this one gets a 'meh' from me...sounds like: Neptunes grab artist, do the Strokes or Killers or whatever band you just said…

B: Yup, and that's it. I bet I won't even hear about this song in the mainstream…wait, I take that back. I'll hear about it, but only for a second. Poor guy.....well, there's always the UK.

A: Yep...off to the lesser markets for you Kenna. And Chad, if you read this (heh, heh), we already know you and Pharrell do non hip-hop...you don't have to make contrived genre music to still convince us.

B: When you're right, you're right Mr. A.

4. Unknown artist – Irreplaceable: the man’s version

A: Ok...final one: unknown artist/female tormenter with ‘Irreplaceable, the man's version’...

B: LOL…yup.

A: To the RIGHT to the RIGHT!

B: This was enjoyable, but it‘s so base and crude that you can't listen to it in any other venue other than in a car or with friends (preferably around girls). This certainly ain’t going on nobody's Ipod…and what's with the Casio synth in the background? I swear I had one that sounded just like that when I was 12.

A: Do you really think this ain't going on anyone's Ipod when it gets out? Apparently, the original is now a legitimate female anthem... so the backlash was inevitable. I mean, this dude sounds mad at women in general. Personally, I would've been fine at leaving this one for the ladies...

B: It’s Scrubs vs. Pigeons again. And what I find funny is that in each version, the main point of the song is the whole " Listen I got the cash I paid for it so YOU are replaceable cause I can find another goldigging guy/girl in a minute.....matter fact he/she'll be here in a minute." Good for you! He/she only wants your cash! I can't see Beyonce saying this to Jay though, or maybe she would: I can see Usher driving up to the door right now....lol.

A: So goldigger is officially gender neutral now? This is social progress?

B: I think it is.

A: Dude sounds like Case during his ‘Mary’ days: 'TRRRRRRRRRRICK give me MY PHONE!!!' Hey, publicity is publicity. Whoever did this wanted the attention…

B: That's true...I can't get the song outta my head now. And the ‘hour’ and ‘shower’ rhyme, pure genius...well not genius. You have to admit, though, get a bunch of guys in a car after a night out and play this track, man: you better put that song on repeat for the drive home....cause it’s a rap.

A: Already been lived, son...<sangs> "Because there's soooooooo many of yooooooooooooooou..." Shout out to the Brother Kwame.

B: Lol, only a guy could appreciate that…

A: I guess this does serve a purpose...I just can't see your average female finding a sense of humor about this...

B: Definitely. I don't think I'd play this song around my girl: she'd probably look at me and say "is that what you think?" And I'd have to say, "No baby, there's only ONE of you!"

A: Not the sort of dialogue you'd want to promote...even with me…cuz bitches are never mad at me. Ever.

A: So there it is...for semi-harmless, swagger-jacking misogyny…thumbs up! As long as the room has been cleared of all estrogen, first.

B: Yup and if you don't mind the horrible rhymes and the 1992 synth. As well as the angst this guy is portraying, it so palpable it’s depressing. Thumbs way UP!

Hope you enjoyed the first A&B review...holla at me with some input...